Okay..today I texted Eri and saying that I was so sorry. I was asking if everything will be same as before but sadly, it won't. Eri says "I'm sorry, but you'll find another one soon. I know you will." Damn, that word will haunt me forever. This effects of this break-up is starting to take up its role..making me feel guilty..desperate and depressed. Ugh! I promised to Eri that I won't break my promise in not cutting myself. Wait a minute..I have nothing to do with the promise anymore, so that means I can cut myself? Hello..pocket knife xD nah..wouldn't do it..well, eventually. I'm the kind who forgives and forget but this.. Its too hard for me to let it go. This will take time. A long time. Just so you know, this is my second relationship with someone and it is also the longest. 5 month together. Like maybe you say, "Its only 5 months..thats not so long. Find another one, silly..". Well, for me..5 months is long to develop my feelings towards Eri. How can I find another one to replace Eri?! Might have to wait then.. Unlike most of you..i'm not that into socializing with people. I have a very low self-esteem and I get shy easily. It would take maybe about a month for me to be close to new people and get to know them well. It also depends on what kind of person I met. Maybe Eri is right..i'll find another find soon. But it will take time coz now i'm focusing on my life purposes and my future. Yes, most people said "Single Life is better". Imma try and prove that sentence is correct. >.<
That's all for today's post.
Goodnight!
Cheers!
xoxo,
Jaceyy
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