Friday, December 25, 2009

Christmas Day! :D

Before begin, I just want to say Merry Christmas to all of you! May God bless you always. Okay, christmas is not as bad as I thought unlike the other years. So many thing that has happened to me this year. I managed to find my true self well kinda. I've changed a lot after the break up with Vanessa two months ago and I know wear different color shirts. Unlike wearing black shirts all the time. Other than that, I'm also into collar tee now. I'm getting matured, oh gawd! I feel like its not me but owh well, people needs changing in the life. I'm more cheerful now, more open..likes to be silly and oh my gawd, I'm drinking for goodness sake. I never like to drink before but now I drink like hell. Okay..for this year's christmas, someone has just made my day. Her name is Monique. Seriously, she actually made me the most cheerful person today. When she smiled, I get happy. Its so sad that we lived far from each other, she's in Perth and I'm stuck in Sabah. UGH! I wanna meet her so badly, we both could hangout together and it'll be awesome. She said to me even the ice cubes would get jealous of us. I don't know what she meant by that but its funny! I don't know, I think I may like her. It's begins when I try to help to not to cut herself and help her to be happy, I ended up by falling for her. But in her eyes, I'm just a friend, nothing more than that. I asked my friends, and they say that I should asked her. OMG! It would never be the same if I asked her. What if she says "no", gosh! That would be hurtful but at least I know that she only wants to be friends. But everytime I talk or text with her, I feel happy. It eases the pain inside me. I really want to tell her but I'm afraid if it will ruin our friendship. What if she thinks i'm a freak and avoid me? That would kill me completely. Maybe I should just see and what happens. Its the best christmas day today. It was alright. She made me happy, and I'm glad. Hope for next year will be more merrier and changes shall occur. I'll be 19 next year in July 10th. Getting older each year. *sigh* owh well, thats life.

Anyways, Merry Christmas to all of you!

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